Posted by: mountainmomma18 | August 17, 2009

One of the bravest people I know (or rather I don’t know her, I just read her blog)

So you will notice over in my sidebar and I regularly read The Nie Nie Dialogues, which after either knowing me or reading me for awhile might seem odd. Here I am a bit cynical and smart-assed/foul mouthed (I am really trying to watch the swearing if only because the bug is repeating everything) girl, plus I am pretty obnoxious, I mean I’m fun, but you know. Nie Nie is a blog about a woman, her children and her struggle with faith after a near fatal plane crash in which she was burned over 80% of her body. Ok, maybe it does sound like something I’d read, well except the faith part, but really that is what drew me in. I started reading around last January and at first I was not sure what kept me coming back, here was this young woman with four children who didn’t focus on the negative, on what happened when the kids drove her crazy, but instead on the positive, it was refreshing, something all of us need on those days when we have the keys in our hands ready to run away for a few days and leave our husbands to deal with it all. But there are other bloggers who do that right? None with Nie Nie’s spirit. Her joy at her children and husband is contagious and uplifting (and even I can’t believe I just wrote that), she was not judgmental, just inspiring, often reminding me to search for the good in that crappy day. But more than that I was drawn to Nie Nie’s achingly honest struggles with her faith and, well, her life. Here she was, lucky to be alive, to be able to see her children grow and yet that survival meant she would be in pain, would have to go through a myriad of medical procedures and deal with the drastic changes in her appearance. Imagine this is you, what would you be feeling, how would you deal? Would you rail at God or seek his wisdom? Personally I do not know what I would do, but I think something like this might push me further away from God (or whatever deity that you may worship), I would rail about the unfairness of it all, even as I should be thankful of what I still had. I am what you would (or rather what my mother calls) a lapse Catholic. For a long time after leaving my mom’s house and Catholic school I refused to go to church, except on Christmas and Easter and only because of mom guilt. This is back when I was young and decided that I just could not be around hypocritical people who spend their week being decidedly un-Christian, but then show up at Church every Sunday and think that matters. I also was annoyed by references to other religions and the idea that ours was somehow better, or the best and only way to get to heaven. None of this tempered my belief in God, just my ideas about organized religion. Now I’m older and the husband and I have been going back to church with the bug, which has been nice, but sometimes a struggle. I have learned that hypocrisy is not always cut and dried, and I am still really turned off by people who proselytize at me or others, who believe that their religion and/or practices are the only way to go and think that morality should be legislated, because I certainly do not. And while my struggles with faith do not come close to what Nie Nie goes through on a daily basis, it has given me a place to think about what faith really means, which is to give up some control to a higher power, even if giving up control and trusting in something bigger than you has never been your strong suit. I know it sounds cheesy but it seems that Nie Nie does not write for herself alone, even while it seems like you’re reading her diary. Since I started reading the blog I have thought that she is one of the bravest people I know, and now she proves it once again. Nie Nie has posted on her blog something she has resisted, a picture of herself now, after the crash. I could never imagine having that kind of courage, but it certainly seems important, to her, as she struggles with her new face and reconciling that into what her life is now, not the same, but still beautiful. If you have a change please go check her blog out, this is a woman who is so beautiful inside and out that you will be inspired. My snarky ways will return soon, but even I have a heart, a very big one- betcha didn’t know that.

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Responses

  1. It sounds like a good blog for anyone to read. I’ll have to take a look.


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