Posted by: mountainmomma18 | April 25, 2010

For Frog’s sake!

So currently at our house it is frogs, just frogs and only frogs ALL. OF. THE. TIME. It’s probably our fault, it seems to have all started when we bought the newest Disney movie The Princess and the Frog DVD. I should totally make some excuse as to why this was done by two PhD’s, but I’m kind of tired from the frogapolooza over here, so I’ll be honest. I totally wanted to see it. I love Disney World and have been 6 times since my first visit at 25. My daughter was conceived there. You wouldn’t know it to look at me, it’s not like I wear Tinkerbelle tee shirts or anything, but I love it all. Maybe it’s because when I was a kid my hippie parents were not too hip on all things cooperate and consumerist- now I am redoing my childhood with my money- and I hope Mickey buys some stock with it because I don’t care. And the bug has three princess dresses, which she likes to wear when she plays choo-choos- and I totally look forward to the day when the bug is old enough to take to the movies to see the newest movie and we can gorge ourselves on overly buttered popcorn and fizzy sodas (another no-no for my parents). But since I do not think that the movies is an appropriate place for a two year old- except on free summer Tuesdays when the whole place is filled with small children and it is super noisy and no one cares because it is free- I waited patiently for two months for the thing to come out on DVD. And I enjoyed it- the first like 20 times I watched it- but now on viewing 17, 562, not so much. The bug has fallen in love with the movie- in spite of the actual people in it. What she really, really loves are the frogs, and the gator, and Raymond (but my friends call me Ray) the Cajun lightening bug.  And it’s constant talks about frogs, and ribbiting and hopping up and down, and while I know this is just one of many phases she will have as she gets older, it’s the cursing that is causing most of the problems.

You see it seems that we need to really work with the bug on her R’s, because when she yells frog, it does not sound like frog, it sounds like “fuck.” Ah yes, and let me tell you it is fantastic. The first time it happened the husband and I looked at each other like “dude do you see where your potty mouth has gotten us?” But then she grabbed her frog and we figured out what she was saying. She did the same thing when my mom was here and I got a not nice look from my mom before I explained the linguistic stages of children who substitute easy letter sounds for ones that are too hard for them, thus frog becomes fuck. I think she bought it, but I did get the side eye. But the best part of all of this when we were at the mall and went into the Disney store where there was a whole wall of frogs and lightening bugs and gators.  Of course the bug yelled “frogs” and ran toward them, but that isn’t what she said. The whole store stopped to stare at us, and I could see their brains working- parenting FAIL.  But did we learn our lesson there? No.

About a week ago we decided to get a small fish tank because both my husband and my daughter seem to enjoy looking at fish swim around in a circle- hey who am I to judge? While we were at the fish store we saw some- you guessed it- albino frogs. And once again the bug cursed up a storm in her excitement. I tried to explain to the clerk what she was saying, but I don’t think she believed me, especially since the husband was laughing so hard. And now I hear it everyday because of course the frogs came home with us. Again, we are awesome parents. Now we are having the same problem with her sidewalk chalk- I will let you guess what chalk sounds like when toddlers substitute sounds.

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Responses

  1. We have been fortunate to not have that problem…although with the potty mouths around here, I don’t doubt that my daughter will let “fuck” fly freely sooner or later!

  2. That’s hysterical! Kids are so damn funny. Sometimes on purpose and sometimes w/out knowing it.

    Malapropisms are the best, although you’re not really talking about them, but they crack me up. My daughter called my older son’s girlfriend “Halloween” for the longest time. Her name was “Colleen.”

    I know my kids did some similar things like that. Somehow any word that starts with an F, sounds like fuck when they’re small. Too funny!

    Enjoy.

  3. Heh! Same thing happened to my friend’s son when he tried to say frog.

    So you have a PhD? I didn’t know. Cool.

    We are going to Disney World in a few weeks! We were having withdrawals because we haven’t been there since February.


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